Special Blessings from Above

Thank you my angels for the beautiful gift
It was delivered at noon on that Sunday in March
Mommy and Daddy couldn't wait
To see the beautiful child God helped them create
We all were longing for that moment
that the angels would carry you from heaven above
Into their waiting arms
I was praying for a healthy child,
hoping for all the parts to be there
pleading for a perfect baby
thank God for unanswered prayers
He makes no mistakes
Thank God for the Special Child
Thank God for you, my angel.
If you were that perfect child, you wouldn't be you
So happy, so loving, so beautiful
You have been through so much
Yet, you did it with such grace
If you were that perfect child
Milestones would be taken for granted
Not like they are now,
with each one, my heart swells with pride and joy
You, my angel, have exceeded all our expectations
I want to shout to the world
Thank you Sweet Jesus
You gave us a special child and she is wonderful
Special baby, you have taught me so much.
You taught me patience, courage, and love
Yes, God does not make mistakes
Someone has to care for the special ones
the ones who need the extra care
the extra love, the extra help
the special ones that God has sent
somehow these children have more love to give
They have courage beyond belief
They look up to their family with those trusting eyes.
These special ones know we will make it all better.
do you think God did not know what He was doing?
HE matched the perfect child with the perfect family.
A family that loves you more than life itself
You, my child, are a special child
I wouldn't want it any other way.

Voices

Go Away! Can't you see I am trying to write?
No, I don't want to lie down. Or is is lay down. Never can remember. Oh, you don't know which word it is either. Go Away! Get out of my head! I wish I could close my eyes and you would be gone. What will it take to make you disappear? I know............. I am a good person. Iam a good person. I am a good person. I 'm happy! I love myself. God loves me.

No, He does not. Why are you whining about your "feelings". Do you think God cares about your "feelings. " Huh?
You are a bad person, a bad mother, a bad sister, a bad daughter, a bad employee, need I go on? I have so much more I can say. Just listen to my voice. I am the only one who will tell you like it is.

I said, Go Away. I don't want to listen to you anymore. I could be so much more if I didn't have to hear you all the time. What are you doing in my head?

I have always been here, my dear. Since you were very little. I am the one who told you all those things you feel now. That's why your scared of people. And why the world is such a bad place. Why do you feel so inferior. I hate to toot my own horn, but you fell for all of it. I am the one who told you how small and unworthy you were. Do you remember? You were so afraid. You were Miss Perfect. Never did anything wrong. Always obeyed the rules. Look where it got you! I was having so much fun watching you run behind the couch when someone knocked on the door. I nearly fell down laughing. Couldn't you see what I was doing? Oh Little one. Life justed pasted you by. After all, how unworthy can you be?

Get out of my head. I am trying hard to follow Christ. He said He loves me. He died on the cross for me. He loves you too, I suppose. Jesus said follow Him and I will live with Him forever.

How can God love YOU. What have you done with your life? That's right-nothing! Did you write the all-american novel? Have you make a great discovery? Will anyone care if you stepped off this earth? Your kids don't care about you. Do they call you? Do they come to see you? Open up your baby blues. I am your only friend. I'm always here to listen to you. Of course, I have to give you my feedback. I don't want to hear how Christ loves you and how you want to help people in need. Where is that going to get you? Your nothing. Grow up and start looking in the mirror. What do you see?

I don't know anymore. Whenever, I start to think I have some worth, you are right there. When I start to feel excited about a venture, or a bible class, you won't let up on me. You keep telling me to go to bed, not to worry about household chores. You are there in the morning when I am trying to get ready for work. Where did you come from? Just when I think you have moved to another head, you come back, in full force. What did I do?

What did you do? Why, you were born. The other half of you died on that cold hospital bed. That is the half that contained all your hopes and dreams. Your essence is in the ground. You tried to find it, remember? But the marker is gone. All records were burned. The half that lived is empty . Everything you could have been was buried in that small coffin. You still have the white cross that was on the casket. Take a good look. It's over. It's been over. Your spirit left your body. Everything good died that day. All that is left is saddness.

I know. You win. I can't fight you anymore. Just stay in my head, tell me your stories. I'll listen. I know your right. I was cut in half. The good went away. I was left with emptyness and saddness. I will go to bed now. Pull the covers over my head and listen to you tell me a bedtime story. Goodnight voices. I am sure you will be there in the morning.!

WHEN THE ROAD TAKES A CURVE

Life is full of surprises, sometimes you can't see the curves ahead
It is like a long car ride up and down the hills of time
That old Beetle Bug of a car is just enough for what you need
It was so amazing, all shiny and blue.

You load it up with essentials and some small bags of treats
Fill up the tank , put air in the tires and off you go!
You feel like a small child full of anticipation and excitement
Wondering where the road will take you
It sure looks like smooth sailing

The first decision is faced with xxxxxxxx
You will head West, just like your predessors.
Remember "GO WEST YOUNG MAN"
What an adventure
Confidence prevails.
You are at the top of the world!

You don't know when the road will bend, but you know you are prepared
You turn the radio up loud
Wind blowing your hair
Sun feeling warm on your body, life can't get any better, but just then
The road curves
You downshift and try to stay on away from the shoulder
But, you can't avoid that bump
Where did that rock come from
The ride had been so smooth
The rock came out of nowhere
First, small rocks appeared
They caused the car to jerk a little.
Just a minor affliction
Did one get in the tire?
The gas tank is empty and the gas station appears ahead.
No problem, just fill up the car and the trip will continue.
What's that noise? Money worries start to creep in your thoughts.
The car gets fixed and you are on your way.
You can see for miles and it is all straight sailing for a while

Time for bigger and better car
Life is good

The car of my dreams
a souped up sports car.
Needs a little polishing, but you can handle that

Danger ahead, better slow down
More and more curves
Larger and larger rocks
I need to look at the map and see if there is another path.
Can't take the time to change plans now, it's too late.
The car is giving you more and more problems.
The engine needs repair
You need all new parts, but too much time has passed.
Seems like the bigger the car, the bigger the problems.
When the car was little, you had little problems
Now the car is bigger, it seems like it has a mind of its own
You should be at the controls, but this car is traveling a different path.

The car seems rebellious
Put the car is in First, it speeds in reverse
advance to second, and it speeds with no remorse
Your car always was given the best care,
Serviced when needed, tune ups, new paint job every year.
You molded and loved the car with all your soul.
Why is it rebelling?
Face it
This car never cared about you.
It can't even feel
All the love and respect means nothing
You can't be in the driver's seat all your life
Hand over the controls or your car will swerve out of control
You worry about running stop signs and dangerous passing
All you can do now is pray
Your prize profession is speeding out of your life and you have no control

Maybe you need to point it in the right direction, disengage the brake and see where it goes
You know you should, but fear strikes
You're sure it will hit something and need repairs
or worse, your car will be totaled.
You just can't seem to let go
Memories swirl round and round in your head,
All the years appear in front of you.
The great road trips and the pride of showing it off to family.
The times when the road was just straight, but was conforting
Then, you remember when the battery went dead, and the engine needed an overhaul.
Rust started to appear.
That should have woke you up.
But, no, you were too busy just trying to keep up the payments and upkeep
You should have been home shining and polishing that auto
You didn't.
Are you going to blame the car
It's too late now
It is just a machine, it doesn't love you.
Wake up and smell the gas
Fill it up, give it one last shine, and send it on its way.
Life is full of straight a ways and curves.
You just have to know when to pull over and let the car drive down its own road